Thursday, October 27, 2011

Failure to Communicate

Quick post today. We were using the rain barrel to water the garden and Owen wanted to help. I kept filling his little watering can and told him to water any plants he saw. I filled the can 3 times and we watered, in order: the car, the street, and his shoe on the sidewalk. None of which are plants, or even animate objects. Looks like we'll be working on botany tomorrow.

CK

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Toddler Physics

As Owen discovers more and more ways to have fun, his horizons are definitely expanding. Sure, he's always been aware of gravity. If you face plant on the sidewalk on a daily basis or fall off the kitchen chair again, it's hard to ignore the effects. This afternoon, we learned another important lesson associated with gravity. What goes up, must come down. Specifically, if you throw a softball up in the air, it's going to come down. If you throw said softball straight up over your head, guess where it's landing? Another important physics lesson learned, as well as reinforcement that if you bonk your head, Daddy will probably find it funny if it's a minor bonking.

I was thinking about other physics lessons we're learning and came up with a couple that have been fun. I don't know if you've ever seen the experiment where you fill a jar with rocks until it's "full." After no more rocks can be put in the jar, you fill it with sand in between the voids around the rocks until it's "full" again. Finally, you pour water in to demonstrate that objects are different sizes and you can always fit more in a space.

The application of this rule is just like the stomach of a toddler. Things like vegetables, meats he doesn't want, and plain rice are the size of rocks where very few, if any of the items fit. Fruit and chicken fall into the sand category. Cookies, candy, and ketchup will always fit. That boy loves him some ketchup, we should have bought some Heinz stock. I looked them up since he started eating ketchup about 2 years ago and I'm pretty sure that all of this growth is because of this family:



He's also learning the importance of making deals during dinner. I let him know there's pudding for dessert (sugar-free, we're not monsters for parents) and he needs to eat some of his green beans. We carefully divide green beans into the 'has to eat' and 'doesn't have to eat' piles working on the counting and math skills. Then he utilizes a technique that involves covertly dropping the 'has to eat' pile on the floor where another scientific law takes effect. That law is known as Bella's Law: all objects of a somewhat edible variety that strike the floor are immediately and irretrievably consumed by our chocolate lab Bella. This makes eating unpalatable foods much easier on the little guy and provides entertainment for him while his 'has to eat' pile disappears, earning him the treat. Win-win!

The last law of physics we're running into more often is the law of inertia. Immovable object meets irresistible force. His stubbornness is the immovable object to the irresistible force of me telling him what he needs to do. "It's time to go inside." "No." "Owen, come inside now, we have to eat lunch." "No we don't." "If you don't come inside, you don't get any lunch and I'm going to lock you outside." "Okay."

At this point, I start counting to 5. He always gets angry we're counting, tears up and yells for us to stop, and usually does what we want him to do immediately. You can gauge the level of enjoyment he was getting out of the activity ending by the number we get to before he starts complying with our demands. I've gotten to 4 and a half, but he was having a blast running around the neighbors yard that day. It is unclear what happens when we get to 5, it never happens. I am afraid that there will be a day very soon when I count to 5, being the fifth number that is reached, and he will have continued to ignore me. I'm just assuming the apocalypse will begin at that moment.

CK

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Watch Where You're BAM!

As Owen has gotten older and more independent, we're hearing things like, "I do it myself!" Zip up his own hoodie or pajamas. I don't blame him on the pajamas though, the wife put him in his pajamas once without underpants and nipped lil' Owen because she's a girl and never had to worry about zipping injuries. I was the favorite for quite a while after that.

He wants to get his own juice. Take his plate over to the counter. He wants to walk instead of ride in the cart at the store. The problem with the store is that he LOVES looking at everything except where he's going. This usually results in him starting to veer off to one side or the other, finally turning to look where Daddy went and getting back on course. It often results in a chuckle for Daddy because he'll turn back just in time to be startled by a display or some other inanimate object about to viciously run into him.

We were at Target this afternoon and he was awfully tired. No nap, an hour running around at the Mall Playground. His focus was even more off than normal as he wanted to stop and look at everything. We were finally ready to leave and headed to the front to check out, going through the clothing side of the store. I turned around to get his attention and motivate him to stay with me and try to get out of there.

He was staring over his right shoulder at some kids clothes for some reason. It's not like he wants to wear clothes, he loves him some quality nekkid time. I could see he was drifting straight toward a big rack with shelves at different levels. I said his name to try to get his attention, but he ignored me. Lesson 1: Always listen to Daddy. I said, "Owen" again, this time with a little more urgency as he was about 4 steps from the rack. Lesson 2: When Daddy uses his pay attention voice, you should definitely listen.

Finally, about 2 steps from the rack, I started to give him the quick, loud, authoritative "OWEN!" The O was barely out of my mouth when he realized something was approaching in his peripheral vision. He pulled his head around in time to take a shelf right in the mouth, falling over on his butt stunned. Lesson 3: If you fail to listen to Daddy and walk into something, Daddy will laugh at you.

He was tired, he was slightly injured in the pride department, and he decided that crying was the best option. Have no fear, it only took him about 10 seconds to want to be put back down and walk himself. I'd like to say he learned from his mistake, but as we walked out of the store, my boy was staring over his shoulder behind him.

CK