This'll work. Right? Please work.

As we fast approach a full two weeks since we started the 3 day potty training method, I have to admit I might be losing it. I haven't shaved in 7 days, and probably only shaved last week because I had a business lunch on Tuesday and you really shouldn't show up looking like "ZZ Top - the beginning" for those things. I got the bright idea last night that I would continue to rock the scraggle until we got two consecutive direct hits.

There are three things I failed to consider in this decision. Two of them are heat and humidity. The temperature today was somewhere between $%&@ and Holy $%&@. All that heat and humidity makes everything really unpleasant, especially bad facial hair. The wife has threatened to get Frontline Flea and Tick stuff if I don't stop scratching.

The third thing I forgot is the complete and utter failure to date. It's like he puts a cork in it until dinner is cooking (couple of days ago), neighbors are at the door (yesterday), or he JUST got off the throne after 30 minutes sitting there with my iPod (this morning). The wife got several kids books on potty training to loosen things up and he loves them. But only because he LOVES any book where you can see some sort of cartoon buttock. I'm starting to think this is my future:


The good news is, the wife has vowed not to wax her eyebrows until I can shave in a show of solidarity and support. We also like to take a united front parenting approach so we can share in the disaster. She's probably going to kill me, but I found a picture of the last time she went an extended period of time without waxing the eyebrows:


We'll see how long either of us hold out. I'm thinking about 6 more minutes. I can see the shaving cream from where I type, 9 feet away.

Changing topics, one of the things I really need to do is start putting some of the conversations I have down on paper. Maybe a conversation or comment of the day. We had this one last night:

Owen starts at dinner: "Daddy's in the car."
Me: "I'm in the car? Where am I going?"
Owen: "Yes."
Me: "Okay. So I'm in the car going to yes. Is there anyone else in the car?"
Owen (excited): "A octumpus!"
Me (gently parenting): "No, it's 'AN octumpus'. Go to timeout for bad grammar."

Maybe that last line isn't accurate.

CK